Why does nothing feel real anymore?

Its hard to describe, Ive just been so much over the past couple of years (parents divorced, custody battle, used to be addicted to ex-lax, used to binge, currently i drink, I fight with my mother monthly almost to the point that i get kicked out of her house on a regular basis) Its just, with all these problems in my life, i can't feel anything anymore, i can't get angry, i can't really get happy, i can't love, i just live in a state of perpetual depression. What should i do to go back to the way i used to be? i used to love life and every experience felt fresh, vivid, now everything seems faded, like an old photo. And I'm so depressed.. what do i do? i just want to feel again